preaching to the choir

I’m suffering a mild, perhaps major, attack of self-doubt at the moment.

I found myself pissed right off this morning at some ding-dong I don’t even know. And then I got pissed at myself for being pissed at him. And then I yelled at a guy in traffic, and may have made a gesture . . . Or three.

Not good.

I have so many other worries right now . . . Getting this darn house sold, raising my boy.

Big worries, little worries, everyday annoyances. There are plenty. Such is life.

So why do I keep insisting on taking on the worries I write about in this blog? I have to wonder what, if any, difference its making?

I keep running into folks who seem to think that you don’t have the right to talk about or question our food system unless you are running a humungous industrial agricultural operation or are publishing in Scientific Journal or some other baloney.

I was actually asked today

How do you know what to eat or drink if you don’t trust science???

First of all, I never said I didn’t trust science in and of itself, I said I don’t trust the system that sees scientific papers published.

Since when does a mother need to read scientific journals to make sane decisions about what to feed or not feed her family? Have we fallen that far????

If we have, things are even worse than I thought.

Maybe we should just all give up now.

Soylent Green, anyone?

What has happened to our common sense? Our ability to make informed decisions free from all the rhetoric and red herrings? Why can’t I question the practices of companies like Monsanto or confinement farming methods without being drawn into some irrelevant (and untrue) argument about my being anti-worker? Why on earth does it have to be so complicated????

And I realized today, I’m just as much to blame for complicating matters. I spend so much time reading and writing about these issues, that I forget that most folks don’t do the same. I’ve fallen victim to jargon and have allowed my outrage to make me vulnerable to baiting by morons.

I’m questioning whether I’m actually helping people make change, ask questions and improve our food system, or if I’m just preaching to the choir . . . A choir that can’t be heard over the big-money blowhards of the other side.

I wish I could just say to the Monstanto’s of the world

Give your head a shake! Cut it out!

But I can’t.

I keep telling myself that that shouldn’t stop me. That we don’t need to be scientists or factory farmers or CEO’s of major agricultural corporations to make change. That we can make change at home, one meal, one seed at a time.

Today that just feels childish and naive.

All I am is a Mama who wants the best future possible for her son. For him to be safe and healthy and have access to safe, nourishing food that doesn’t hurt him, the environment or the workers who produce it.

I don’t think that’s too much for a mother to ask.

5 thoughts on “preaching to the choir

  1. patsquared2

    When I start to doubt the foundations of my world, I meditate. It brings me back to center (and reduces the hand gestures). And what you write, whether hundreds read or just you and I, counts. It makes a difference to you, to start with. It helps you wrap your arms around your life, your children, and think through rather than just accept. It helps your kids learn to think, too. And, frankly, it helps me knowing that there is a like-minded soul out there — that, “… voice crying in the wilderness” as Edward Abbey wrote in his seminal work of the same title.

    Don’t stop writing. Don’t doubt yourself. You are one of the few out in this world who are what Irving Goffman called, “…inner directed.” Too many of your peers (and mine) have become “other directed” — only forming opinions based on what everyone else thinks, only hiring experts and not trusting themselves to do, to know, to understand.

    We’re out here, reading, thinking and enjoying your company. I would hate to lose another voice….

    Reply
  2. Jimmy Cracked-Corn

    In my opinion, science isn’t wrong. When science is asked to answer a question, they do so without emotional involvement, to the best of the data they are able to collect and observe.

    For example, the FDA says that there isn’t anything wrong with BPA, that is won’t hurt people. They say there were told this by scientists. They were, BUT….

    Scientists are LITERAL. Obscenely literal. If you ask a scientist whether a certain chemical will “hurt people” they will quietly fret to themselves that they aren’t allowed to experient on actual people. When that’s over, they start trials on mice or monkeys or rabbits. They give the animals extremely high doses of the chemical and observe what happens.

    Then they make a report. No observable damage caused by BPA. Liver, kidneys, heart, pancreas, stomach, bones, etc., are all comparable to the control subject.

    They didn’t test the animals for autistic tendencies, asperger’s, tourettes, third-generation birth defects, elevated levels of estrogen in males, or 100 other things because they weren’t asked to do those tests.

    On the other hand, not all scientists are completely honest. Some can be bought by lobbyists. Everyone has a price, right?

    I’m not sure where this is going, but I, too, am tired of people who are happy to believe what they are told and to live in a world that is entirely black or white.

    Reply
  3. Growing Up in the Garden

    I, too, think you should keep writing. You may be preaching to the choir, or you may not, but the choir needs a space to dialogue. My dialogue with you here in the blogosphere keeps my wheels greased (so to speak) and helps me to fine tune my arguments/understanding/philosophy. It also gives us a space to blow of some steam. Don’t back down!

    Reply
  4. The Slow Foods Mama Post author

    Thanks for the encouragement, everyone. I appreciate it. Some days its hard not to feel like a batty lady talking to herself, or like one of the good old boys on the corner with a cardboard sign preaching that the end is near!

    I’m still not sure how much of a difference I’m making, but I realized that if I don’t write, there’ll be a lot more hand gestures, and nobody wants that. 🙂

    Reply
  5. Pingback: food advocacy goals : decentralizing our food-system | The Slow Foods Mama

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